Heather McKinney
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Sobbing and Rocking
I should be watching the concert in front of me. I can’t. I can’t focus on anything but the couple across the aisle. A diminutive pair, the man is wearing a short sleeve white shirt with a blocky black floral… Continue reading
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Real Characters
For awhile in the late twenty-teens (what do we even call the years between 2010 and 2019?), I was miserable. Just absolutely down-in-the-dumps, ready to drive my car into a highway median. I didn’t want to die, exactly, but I… Continue reading
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My Application to be a Female Motorhome Travel Companion
This was a post on someone’s NextDoor neighborhood app that has been screenshot and shared online. The questionnaire follows a photo of a motorhome parked at a gas pump outside of a combination Pilot truck stop/Hardee’s restaurant, the worst gas station/restaurant… Continue reading
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The Gifts We All Give
This week, Paris and I caught up on the new TV series Abbott Elementary. If you’re not watching that show, you may be the only one. The runaway hit has been compared to Modern Family and has grown almost as fast. I’ve laughed… Continue reading
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Spa Day
The most dangerous taco I ever had was a Taco Diner in the West Village in Dallas. I love Taco Diner. They serve Mambo Taxis, which are maybe my favorite drink. A Mambo Taxi is a frozen margarita with sangria… Continue reading
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Oh Baby
One summer morning, my mom rounded the corner of our hallway and found me, her youngest child, just ten-years-old on the toilet, in turn guzzling soda and grunting. “What are we doing now?” she asked, looking from the two-liter bottle… Continue reading
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Happy Phil McKinney Appreciation Day
Happy early Valentine’s Day and Happy Galentine’s Day! In the past couple of days, I’ve had a couple of people tell me that they don’t care for Valentine’s Day all that much. Either it bums them out because they are… Continue reading
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Legal Question: Logistics of a Hallmark Movie Ending
This question comes from Michele L., who asks: In light of the endless Hallmark/Lifetime Christmas movies I’ve seen (they started doing Halloween week and I cannot stop watching; send help) where a lovely American lady meets and is swept off… Continue reading
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Religious Phanatic
It’s 9:30 AM on a Friday. I am lying in bed, phone in hand. I’ve been in this position for nearly two hours. By this time, I have caught up on celebrity gossip, scrolled Reddit and Twitter, and finished my… Continue reading
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I Went to the Prison-Themed Parking Lot Circus So You Don’t Have To
For the first time in probably a decade, I hear the opening guitar riff of Will Smith’s 2002 hit song “Black Suits Comin’ (Nod Ya Head),” the theme song for the film Men in Black II. It should be noted that… Continue reading
Heather versus the World 