Today I found myself in a place I often am – the Starbucks drive through. While we waited for my drink, the barista in the window and I made small talk.“Did you do anything fun today?” she asked.“I just woke up from a nap because I went to a kid’s birthday party earlier.”“Yikes,” she said. … Continue reading As Seen on TV
“That’s Lynn,” my mom said, pointing to a woman we had only ever met online. I was twelve and accompanying my mom on an in-person meeting of her fellow members of the Mature Fan Club for the Backstreet Boys, an adults-only online fan group for the band. Yes, I know that’s a lot to unpack … Continue reading Screaming at the Screen
(tw: body image)If you have seen me in person recently, you may have noticed a difference. No, I still haven’t cut my hair. No, I haven’t invested in that face tattoo I’ve been considering. The change you should notice is my receding hunchback. My hunchback and I have been close for years, pretty much since … Continue reading The Biggest Kid in Class
This was a great week for art in my world. First, Bo Burnham, one of my all-time favorite comics released a special on Neflix called Inside. He wrote, performed, shot, and edited it entirely on his own during the pandemic. If you haven’t watched it, just put this newsletter down, go watch it then come back. … Continue reading Just the Thing
Watching Buffy, my 60-pound dog, lying in the sun on the back porch earlier today, I got an idea. I would head outside and do yoga on the patio. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t actually do it. It was sort of muggy outside, and I had just eaten some leftover pizza, and anyway the … Continue reading Thanks, Heather
People have been sending me frog pictures recently. Well, not just me. They send them to the show, post them on our Facebook group, and tag us in posts containing frogs on Instagram. We’ve seen cartoon frogs, real frogs, and frogs with macromutations resulting in eyeballs in their mouths. Most recently, we got a picture … Continue reading You Might Be
RunPeople often describe runners as sort of smug. For instance, someone may casually slip in during a conversation, I've finished three half marathons. For me, that's actually true. I did finish three half marathons. You wouldn't know it to look at me because I don't really look like a runner. I look more like the wacky … Continue reading Run
I started this newsletter after I stopped going to my regular breakfast spot every Sunday because of the pandemic. I used to sit in the same spot at the same bar at the same restaurant and order the same thing from the same bartender every single Sunday. It was fantastic. I am a creature of … Continue reading Regularly Regular
In the moments after announcing that Paris and I were engaged on social media, we were delighted by so many lovely comments and texts. “So happy for you guys!” “Congrats!” “Love this!”On the group chat for one of the comedy troupes I belong to, Watermelon, the messages were much the same. “I screamed!” “Congrats!” But … Continue reading The Beautiful Aftermath
I’m writing this on my back porch on a summer morning, sipping a cup of coffee in my PJs before the sun comes out and roasts everything in sight. The only hiccup in my current pleasant state is what I believe to be a golden dung fly buzzing around me. Don’t let the “golden” fool … Continue reading Gripes of Wrath
Heather vs. the World 